To Fart Or Not To Fart, That Is The Question ?

Relationships are best measured by farting. That is, the stages in a relationship can be defined by the stages of farting.

Stage One: (Conspiracy of silence)

This is the fantasy period where both parties pretend that they have no bodily waste. This illusion is quickly shattered by the first shy … “oh do u fart?” Followed by the sheepish admission of truth.

Stage Tow: (Fart honeymoon)

This is the period of deeper intimacy where both parties find each other’s gas just the cutest thing in the world but of course no honeymoon can last forever!

Stage Three: (Critical fork in the fart)

This is the period where the fart either looses its power to amuse and embarrass their by signifying true love, or else it begins to annoy and disgust thereby symbolizing all that is blocked and rancid in the formally beloved

Twisted, disturbing, nauseating yet brilliant lines from the new movie “ Love and other Disasters”

Seriously, is burping the new way of saying I like you and farting the new way of saying I love you??!!!!!

This reminds me of my friend Kuku who measure intimacy and commitment with the ability of both parties to do their business in front of each other !

Kuku: you should be so comfortable with your significant other to the extent where
both of you are able to do your business without being embarrassed. It shows
that both of you are extremely intimate and committed to each other. I don’t
think I can marry a guy who isn’t comfortable sharing that with me!
The Wise One: that is absolutely disgusting. Some things need to be kept private and
aren’t meant to be shared.
Kuku: your too uptight, I converted Dala3 and I will not rest till I convert you Wise One
The Wise One: Dala3, don’t tell me you subscribe to her lunatic theory now ?!
Dala3: Not to her extent, but I wouldn’t mind it
The Wise One: You guys aren’t normal, absolutely revolting!!!

Certain people think in relationships everything should be shared, vows, house, bank accounts even bathroom time. They view farting and the exchange of bodily fluids as a sign of intimacy. While others believe that even though we should form a unified one , we should still keep certain things about ourselves and our lives private.

which school of thinking do you subscribe to ?

This got my unique, yet slightly twisted and occasionally perverted mind thinking... if we can measure the stages of relationships with the stages of farting, it’s only fitting to redefine the stages of intimacy don’t u think ?

Behold the new basis according to yous truly - Dazed & Confused :)

First base: Farting in front of each other
Second Base: peeing in front of each other
Third Base: crapping in front of each other
Home Run: I don’t wanna go there!!

i bet u'll think twice before rushing between basis now :P

To fart or not to fart , that is the question?

I’m actually asking, so dish people dish : )